melissa's b-day

Melissa had a birthday.  She did some stuff.

happy juneteenth

As you may very well be aware, Juneteenth is celebrated a little differently in the Midwest – it's more of a somber occasion, celebrated with the bi-annual Releasing of the Speckled Newts to acknowledge Father Igor the Hideously Disfigured's contributions to nightmarish bedtime stories.  All the kids love chasing the newts down the street, picking them up, and throwing them into the Woodchipper of Doom.  Everyone laughs and laughs until The Naughtiest Kid of Them All (as voted with a rousing game of Heads-up-7-up played by The Supreme Tribal Council) has his/her left foot customarily amputated.  That's really when it gets somber.  That, and during The Kitten Feeding (to the Dobermans).

Thanks to John for reminding me that yesterday was Juneteenth, also known as Emancipation Day or Freedom Day, the holiday celebrating the abolition of slavery.

that's irony

Believe it or not, the US military screwed up when attempting a software update on their GPS system.  The resulting glitch turned about 10,000 GPS recievers into expensive paperweights for about two weeks.  But that's not really ironic.  During the Gulf War, Saddam tried to jam GPS signals as the US invaded Iraq.  However, his GPS jamming device was destroyed by a GPS-guided bomb.  That's ironic.  And funny.

incorrect wording

I recently read an article about lab mice and how through years of inbreeding one has the capability of (basically) choosing exactly what kind of traits they would like exhibited in their lab mice.  The article mentioned that the researcher who began this heroic effort, Dr. Little, received the Coley Award but stated that the Coley Award was an award given to those who oversaw the upkeep of lab mice.  Before I derisively disparaged such an obviously awesome award, I decided to make sure that the award was indeed given to those taking care of lab mice.  Good thing I did - the award is actually given to "one or more scientists for outstanding achievements in the field of basic immunology and cancer immunology."  Boy would I have looked like an idiot.

 

Instead, I'll just wonder if they're going to make up an award for inbreeding people from the south.  They could call it the Kin-breeding Award.  They're probably not going to.

 

Also, I thought my little play on words (kin-breeding vs in-breeding) was pure comedic genius.  I'm still giggling.

Minnesota Observations

I realize that people are the same no matter where you go. You run into the same types of people everywhere. On Sunday, I actually ran into someone I worked with 6 months ago at Zions. When I saw her I thought to myself - isn't it funny that she looks just like that girl I knew at Zions - people are really just the same no matter where you go. In this case - they were the exact same.

I've also noticed a few other things about Minnesota

1) People don't drive over 70.

2) Highway Patrol cars are brown.

3) You can't get anywhere without a GPS.

4) Streets like 35W do not run East/West as the name suggests - instead it runs North/South. Instead we think it is 35W b/c it lies West of some other random road in the state - we're still figuring this one out.

5) There are about a million little trails to walk on that Bruce just loves - and lots of squirrels for him to try to chase.

6) We have just entered "construction season" as more than one person called it.

7) I've only seen outdoor malls and indoor waterparks - none of the opposite.

8) The people are genuinely nice and kind.

We're enjoying it here so far and are looking forward to the next few months to get settled. Bruce has already settled in and we may regret teaching him to get on the couch at the hotel.